• The Thing About Life

    Happy Mothers Day

    Dear Xander, I have been told on a number of occasions by a number of people (I count 3 so far; your eldest aunt – my eldest sister – and both your grandparents) what an unfilial son I have become, particularly after I settled down, had my own family and am struggling to keep things afloat financially whilst trying to ensure the happiness of those that matter to me. I know the sacrifices parents make first hand because I see and make very much the same sacrifices with our own son. This isn’t a day to mark up your filial piety a few notches to show your appreciation to your…

  • The Things You Do

    And Justice For Dad

    Dear Xander, Your mother was invited to a mommy blogger gathering which I was allowed to tag along, if anything, to keep an eye on you while your mother mingled with the other mommies. It was decided that we would meet up at Fusionopolis, where a new indoor playground called Happy Willow opened 6 weeks ago. I was heartened to find that adults were allowed into the playground which boasted a large ball-pit, to ensure the safety of their playing children. In my head, this effectively meant I was paying $18 for your entry, and I got to play for free, and when your father is pushing 35 years of…

  • Other Things

    We interrupt this programme to tell you we’re interrupting this programme

    Dear all, Most of you have come to expect my letters to Xander to arrive every Monday. The last two weeks have seen a couple of unscheduled letters that were posted nearer the end of the week. I did intend to keep a schedule for the letters, but being a personal blog, I do also realise neither my life nor Xander is inclined to conform to my plans, so here’s the deal. I’ll still try to write weekly, but let’s keep the day of the week a surprise, shall we? It isn’t so much a rhetorical question, so do let me know in the comments if you think it’s a…

  • The Thing About Life

    Never Gonna Give You Up

    Mummy: I think you were too harsh on your last couple of blog posts. Me: Harsh? How? Mummy: For one, you were really harsh on Andre. Also, you sounded like you were asking Xan to give up. Dear Xander, Sometimes, even though a person means well, he or she will inadvertently overstep boundaries, or make mistakes, or push too hard on a piece of advice they think is the only right way to go about doing things. Sometimes, the person will be stubborn and insist his way is the right way. Sometimes, the person will realise what he did and deal with the embarrassment with a quick brush of the…

  • The Thing About Life

    One Night at Grandma’s (Part 2)

    This is the second of a two-part letter, which began here. It was already a good half hour past your bedtime as we prepared to leave Grandma’s house that night. As we were waiting outside, you climbed up on the wood benches in Grandpa’s garden, plopped your chin on the tabletop and continued to sulk. I came over and sat opposite you, asking if you were all right. You replied me with a question. “Why Andre don’t like me?” Times like this really make me wonder if I had missed out on some milestone whilst I was researching on the mental development of a typical 3-year-old, or you were just…

  • The Things You Do

    One Night at Grandma’s (Part 1)

    Dear Xander, Your relationship with your cousin Andre is at best a tumultuous one. There are days when the both of you will laugh and play like best friends, and then things can suddenly turn ugly, when Andre refuses to play with you or share his toys, or you decide to do the same. Andre is about a year older than you, and communicates in spoken English at a level we feel is well beyond his age. He lives mainly with Grandma, which is also where you and Andre get to interact on a weekly basis. One thing that Andre hasn’t quite got the hang of is playing well with…

  • The Thing About Life

    The Importance of a Child’s Imagination

    Dear Xander, Your dad was once an avid comic book collector. In fact, there is a stack of about 200 20-year-old comic books set to be written into your inheritance, the most valuable of which hang across the wall of your playroom, waiting for you to make sense of the imagery contained within their covers. By the time you grow up, printed comic books may no longer be produced, overtaken by their more advanced and many times more interactive digital counterparts. But the stories will no doubt survive, looking at how they are being translated into cinematic experiences such as The Dark Knight, Spider-man, and of course, The Avengers. While…

  • The Thing About Life

    The Bird Bird and the Bees

    The following is part of a telephone conversation overheard by my colleague and her husband during a family dinner, between their 7-year-old son and his classmate, while a Channel 8 drama was showing on TV. Boy: “Eh, ask you something. When you see the kissing scene in the show, does your bird-bird stand up?” Mother stops eating. Father nearly spits his rice out. Boy: “… Ok. … Ok… Ok, I talk to you later, bye.” There is silence at the dinner over the next 2 minutes. Father breaks the silence and asks: “So what did your friend say?” Boy asks, “About what?” Father says, ” The, uh, bird-bird thing.” Boy…

  • The Things You Do

    Thunder Is Afraid of You

    Dear Xander, The recent spate of heavy lightning storms – in particular, the sound of thunder – had you spooked. Uncle Mark’s sister, Felicia, tried to explain to you that thunder occurs because “the clouds in the sky are having a traffic jam”, and the rain banging into each other makes a fair bit of noise. I added that the motor insurance agents also add to the noise as a result. We understand that at your age, your sense of hearing may be a lot more sensitive than us old fogies, and the low rumblings of nature clearing its bladder may be playing on your sense of securities. Nonetheless, it…